"Excuses- Part 1" joke

Here are some excuses for if someone asks you to do something with them...
I'd love to but... I have to floss my cat.
I'd love to but... I've dedicated my life to linguini.
I'd love to but... I want to spend more time with my blender.
I'd love to but... The President said he might drop in.
I'd love to but... The man on television told me to stay tuned.
I'd love to but... I've been scheduled for a karma transplant.
I'd love to but... I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.
I'd love to but... It's my parakeet's bowling night.
I'd love to but... It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People.
I'd love to but... I'm building a pig from a kit.
I'd love to but... I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it.
I'd love to but... I'm enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.
I'd love to but... There's a disturbance in the Force.
I'd love to but... I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling.
I'd love to but... I have to go to the post office to see if I'm still wanted.
I'd love to but... I'm teaching my ferret to yodel.
I'd love to but... I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products.
I'd love to but... I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal.
I'd love to but... I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves.
I'd love to but... My crayons all melted together.
I'd love to but... I'm trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.
I'd love to but... I'm in training to be a household pest.
I'd love to but... I'm getting my overalls overhauled.
I'd love to but... My patent is pending.
I'd love to but... I'm attending the opening of my garage door.
I'd love to but... I'm sandblasting my oven.
I'd love to but... I'm worried about my vertical hold.
I'd love to but... I'm going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise.
I'd love to but... I'm being deported.
I'd love to but... The grunion are running.
I'd love to but... I'll be looking for a parking space.
I'd love to but... My Millard Filmore Fan Club meets then.
I'd love to but... The monsters haven't turned blue yet, and I have to eat more dots.
I'd love to but... I'm taking punk totem pole carving.
I'd love to but... I have to fluff my shower cap.
I'd love to but... I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.
I'd love to but... I've come down with a really horrible case of something or other.
I'd love to but... I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.
I'd love to but... My plot to take over the world is thickening.
I'd love to but... I have to fulfill my potential.
I'd love to but... I don't want to leave my comfort zone.
I'd love to but... It's too close to the turn of the century.
I'd love to but... I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary.
I'd love to but... My subconscious says no.
I'd love to but... I'm giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.
I'd love to but... I left my body in my other clothes.
I'd love to but... The last time I went, I never came back.
I'd love to but... I've got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.
I'd love to but... I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.
I'd love to but... None of my socks match.
I'd love to but... I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.
And Finally...
I'd love to but... I'm having all my plants neutered.

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