"Good For a Laugh" joke

(Excerpted from an Ann Landers Column)
These are reportedly signs in English collected by Air France employees:
1. From a Tokyo Hotel:
It is forbidden to steal towels. If you are not a person so do such a thing, please do not read this notice.
2. In a Leipzig, Germany elevator:
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
3. Paris hotel elevator:
Please leave your values in at the front desk. If you lose them in your room, we are not responsible.
4. Athens hotel:
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 am daily.
5. Yugoslovian hotel:
The flattening of underware with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid..
6. Japanese hotel:
You are invited to take advantage of the woman who are employeed to clean the rooms.
7. Moscow hotel:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and
writers are buried daily except Thursday.
8. Hong Kong tailor shop:
Ladys may have a fit upstairs.
9. Bangkok dry cleaners:
Drop your trousers here for best results.
10. Paris dress shop:
Elegent dresses designed for street walking.
11. Rhodes, Greece tailor shop:
Order your summer suit. Because of the big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
12. Japanese hotel:
Cold and Heat: If you want to condition the warm in your room, please control yourself.
13. German camping site:
It is strictly forbidden on our Black Forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance,
men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that
purpose.
14. Rome laundry:
Ladies, please leave your clothes here and spend the evening having a good time.
15. Czech tourist agency:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours. We guarantee no miscarraiages.
16. Swiss mountain inn:
Todays special - no ice cream.
17. Copenhaegan airline:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.
18. Moscow hotel:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
19. Norwegian lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
20. Tokyo car rental firm:
When passenger with heavy foot is in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but
if he still obstacle your passage, then tootle with vigor.
21. Acapulco hotel:
We are pleased to anounce that the water served here is passed by manager himself personally.

(Above is sent to me by a friend. Most of you probably have read these already. But still there may
be many who read this for the first time. So, I thought it is better to share this with the first-timers.)