"Great Pick Up Lines!" joke

I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.Did you know they changed the alphabet? They put U and I together.Can I borrow that quarter, 'cause my mom told me to call home when I fell in loveWhat's wrong? You're looking a little sad and gloomy. What you need is some vitamin me.Are your legs tired? 'cause you been running through my mind ALL day long.Are you lost? 'cause it's so strange to see an angel so far from heaven.Is your father a thief? 'cause he stole the sparkle from the stars, and put it in your eyes. (yo, watch out though, and be prepared with a snappy answer just in case she says 'yes')Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by you again? What's that in your eye? Oh...it's a sparkle.If I said you were an angel, would you treat me like the devil tonight? Can I see that label? I just wanted to know if you were made in heaven.Do you like raisins? How about a date? So... How am I doin'? I miss my teddy bear...Would you sleep with me? You look great and all, but do you know what'd really look good on you? Me.Could I get some directions? ("To where?") To your heart.Is it hot in here, or is it just you? If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? Look at you, with all those curves, and me with no brakes.Can I flirt with you? Hi, my name's _____, but you can call me "lover".(another quarter line). Could I borrow a quarter? 'cause I just want to call your mother and thank her.(lick your finger and then touch her shirt). Here, let me help you out of those wet clothes.What do you like for breakfast? Say, did we go to different schools together? Hi, my name is _____, how do you like me so far?(At the copy machine) Reproducing, eh? Can I help? Woman asks, "Excuse me, do you have the time?" You: "Do you have the energy?"You look like the type of girl that's heard every line in the book. So what's one more? Hi, I make more money than you can spend.I'm new in town...could you give me directions to your apartment? I think you're the most beautiful girl I've seen...on a WednesdayI know this is going to sound like a line, but did that sound like a line? Are you disappointed? I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk.Do you have a map? I just got lost in your eyes.Are you religious? Good, cause I'm here to answer your prayers.Did it hurt? (Did what hurt) When you fell out of heaven.Inheriting 80 million doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.I lost my phone number, can I borrow yours? If your parents hadn't met, I'd be a very unhappy man right now.Do you drink milk? It sure did your body good.

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