"He was only trying to help!!!" joke

The other day I ran into a friend of mine. He had a black eye. So I asked him, "How did you get that shiner?""You won't believe it," he answered, "but I got it in church!""Your kidding!", I replied. "How did you manage that?"He said, "Well, here's what happened. When the preacher finished his sermon he told us all to get out our hymn books, turn to page 41 and stand up to sing.""Yes, yes" I responded. "Then what?""Well" he continued with a pained look on his face, "when the lady that was sitting in front of me stood up, I noticed that her dress got stuck in the crack of her ass. And, well, I knew she didn't want it that way so I reached over and pulled it out.""And she hit you?!!" I asked."Knocked me out cold." he finished, shaking his head.Well we chuckled about it, talked for a few more minutes and went our seperate ways. The following week I ran into my friend again. This time he had two black eyes. "How did you get another black eye?" I asked.He just looked straight ahead and said, "I got it in church.""No way! How?" I asked.He replied, "Well you know that lady I told you about who was sitting in front of me last week?" I nodded."Well there she was again. And this time when we all stood up to sing I noticed that her dress didn't get caught in the crack of her ass. But I knew she didn't want it that way, so I put it back."

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