"Q: How Was Copper Wire Invented?" joke

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee? A: A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
Q: How was copper wire invented?
A: Two lawyers arguing over a penny.
Q: What do you get if you beat the shit out of a lawyer?
A: An empty suit.
Four out of five doctors say that if they were stranded on a deserted island with no lawyers, they wouldn't need any aspirin.
Q: What do lawyers and bullfrogs have in common?
A: Both have a big head that consists mostly of mouth.
Q: Why is it dangerous for lawyers to walk onto a construction site when plumbers are working?
A: The plumbers might connect the drain line to the wrong suer.
Q: What do you get if you cross a lawyer with a drunk pig?
A: Nothing. There are some things even a drunk pig won't do.
Q: What do lawyers and sperm have in common?
A: They're both squirmy, both live in slime, and only one in 250 million accomplishes anything worthwhile.
Q: How does a pregnant woman know that she is carrying a future lawyer?
A: She has an extreme craving for baloney.
Q: What do you get when you cross a librarian with a lawyer?
A: All the information you need - but you can't understand a word of it.