"How to tell if your Viagra is working" joke

How to Tell if Your Viagra is Working
At work, they call you a spiritualist because when you sit down at a meeting, the table floats.
The paleness of your face (because of the lack of blood) - It's all you-know-where.
You begin to look at the dog with interest.
You fall naked and face down on the beach and the point comes out in New Zealand.
They confuse you with the duracell bunny.
When you come into a sauna, everyone stands up and applauds.
You begin to think that your mother-in-law is pretty.
You no longer need the TV remote control.
You killed a passer-by with a button that flew off your new Levis.
If you die, they won't be able to close your coffin for three days.
They begin to call you "the tripod."
The butchers look for you because they ran out of peperoni.
You go out to sunbathe nude and (if you're standing) the birds perch on it to rest, or (if you're lying down) you look like a sundial.
When you go camping all you bring is the canvas, but you leave the tent poles behind.
Everyone lets you get in line in front of him or her in the bank, the supermarket, etc.
Pinocchio doesn't look like such a liar, compared with you.
When you go to the kitchen in the middle of the night, you can carry the glass of milk, the cookies, the napkins, the plate, and other things that you couldn't before using just 2 hands.
You always lose limbo contests.
Lewinsky wants you to be president someday.
You can make drawings in the sand at the beach without having to look for a stick.
You had them take down the ceiling fan in the bedroom because you like to sleep on your back.

A guy steps into an elevator and there's just one attractive woman in it.
He turns around to push the button for his floor and his elbow bumps right into her breast.
He says, "Oh, I'm so sorry. If your heart is as soft as your breast, I hope you'll be able to more...

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A mother had 3 virgin daughters. They were all getting married within a short time period. Because Mom was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on how marital sex felt.
The more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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