"Lawyer's Deathbed" joke
A lawyer was on his deathbed in his bedroom, and he called to his wife. She rushed in and said, "What is it, honey?"
He told her to run and get the bible as soon as possible. Being a religious woman, she thought this was a good idea. She ran and got it, prepared to read him his favorite verse or something of the sort.
He snatched it from her and began quickly scanning pages, his eyes darting right and left. The wife was curious. "What are you doing, honey?" she asked.
"I'm looking for loopholes!" he shouted.
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