"Little Willies" joke
Willie was quite a boy to have round the house.
Willie, at a passing gent
Threw a batch of fresh cement,
Crying, "Wait until you dry.
Then you'll be a real hard guy."
****
Willie saw some dynamite,
Couldn't understand it quite.
Curiosity never pays.
It rained on Willie seven days.
****
Little Willie, home from school
Where he'd learned the Golden Rule,
Said, "If I eat all this cake,
Sis won't have a stomach-ache."
****
Little Willie on his bike
Through the village took a hike.
Mrs. Thompson blocked the walk.
She will live, but still can't talk.
****
Little Willie lit a rocket
Which his dad had in his pocket,
Next day he told Cousin Dan,
"Daddy is a traveling man."
****
Little Willie in the best of sashes
Fell in the fire and was burned to ashes.
By and by the room grew chilly,
But no one liked to poke up Willie.
****
Willie, hitting at a ball,
Lined one down the school-house hall.
Through his door came Dr. Hill.
Several teeth are missing still.
****
Little Willie from the mirror
Sucked the mercury off,
Thinking in his childish error,
It would cure the whooping cough.
At the funeral his weeping mother
Smartly said to Mrs. Brown,
" 'Twas a chilly day for Willie
When the mercury went down."
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