"No More Sex" joke
After being married for many years, an elderly, very loving couple is shocked when the woman's doctor tells them she has a serious heart condition which could kill her at any time. She is to avoid stress, eat properly and never, ever have sex again. The strain would be far too much for her.
Reluctantly, they attempt to live by these rules. Over time, however, avoiding sex becomes increasingly difficult, so the husband decides to sleep downstairs to avoid the temptation.
This works for a few weeks, until late one night when they meet each other on the stairs. She's coming down and he is heading up.
"Honey, I have a confession to make," she says in a quavering voice. "I was about to commit suicide."
"I'm glad to hear it, sweetheart," the man replies, "because I was coming upstairs to kill you!"
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