"Ready-Made Resolutions For Internet-ers - 1998" joke

Stop neglecting children; at least learn their names and birthdays.
Stop circulating the "Good Times Virus" and "Join the Crew" e-mail.
Read all of the mail from all of the lists I have subscribed to.
Limit my subscriptions of lists to a maximum of fifty.
Back-up 4 gig hard drive weekly; well, maybe at least monthly.
Not rush to any ftp site as soon as I hear of a new Beta.
Insist that all "ten best" lists be strictly limited to ten.
Not buy magazines with AOL disks just to get another 1.44MB disk.
Answer Snail Mail with the same enthusiasm & promptness as e-mail.
Spend less than two hours a day on the Web; on new sites anyway.
Try the e-mail version of the Mrs. Fields cookie recipe.
Promise when I hear "Where do you want to go today?", I won't laugh. (Well, maybe not!)
Think of a password other than "password" to use on web sites.
Never "throw" another snowball via e-mail; at least not 'til next year.
Thanx to the ORIGINAL Joke of the Day!