"Relapse" joke
Oh, Doctor, you mean I'm finally cured?" the woman sighed happily.
"Yes Miss Willoughby," said the psychoanalyst, "I believe we now have your kleptomania firmly under control and you can go out in the workaday world just like anybody else."
"Oh, Doctor, I'm so grateful," said the woman. "I don't know how I'll ever repay you for your help."
"My fee is all the payment I expect," said the kindly analyst. "However, if you should happen to have a relapse, you might pick up a small transistor radio for me."
A couple seated in a Chicago restaurant noticed that all the waiters carried two spoons in their vest pocket. Curious, the man asked their waiter the reason for this.
"Well, sir," the waiter explained, "an efficiency study conducted by management determined more...