"Simply Rajnikant" joke

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Rajnikant.
Rajnikant has counted to infinity - twice!
When Rajnikant does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up. He's pushing the earth down.
Rajnikant is so fast. He can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Rajnikant doesn't wear a watch, he decides what time it is.
Rajnikant gave Mona Lisa that smile.
Rajnikant can't slam a revolving door.
Rajnikant's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
Rajnikant grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his rage.
If you Google search' Rajnikant getting kicked', you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.
It takes Rajnikant 20 minutes to watch 60 minutes.
The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda square, until Rajnikant kicked one of the corners off.
There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq; Rajnikant lives in Chennai.
Rajnikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
The only things that run faster and longer than Rajnikant are his films.
Rajnikant's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of morning jog.
Where there is a will there is a way. Where there is Rajnikant there's no other way.