"The Abc Accident" joke
One day a little boy was at kindergarten. The teacher told the class their homework was to find the first five letters of the alphabet.
When the little boy got home he went to his older brother who was playing video games. "Big brother whats the first letter of the alphabet?". His big brother then said to the little boy "Shut up retard i'm sick of listening to you!".
Then the little boy went on to his second brother who was watching batman. " Big brother what's the second letter of the alphabet?". The older brother who obviously wasn't paying attention said " Na na na na na na na Batman!".
The little boy went on to his dad who was watching football and said "Dad whats the third letter of the alphabet?". His dad then screamed "Forty-niners, forty-niners!".
Once again the little boy went on but this time to his mom who was cooking buns and he said "Mom what's the fourth letter of the alphabet?". His mom then yelled " My buns are on fire, my buns are on fire!".
One last time the boy went to his dad again and said "Dad what's the fifth letter of the alphabet?". His dad who was taking out the garbage sang "In the garbage in the garbage in the garbage.".
The little boy went to school the next day and the teacher asked him what the first letter of the alphabet is the little boy said " Shut up retard i'm sick of listening to you!". The teacher was outraged " Young man what is your name?" " Na na na na na na na Batman!". The teacher was now furious " Go down to the principal's office right now!". The little boy listened and went down to the principal's office.
" All right young man since I am a nice principal i'll let you pick how many spankings you will get". The little boy yelled " Forty niners forty niners". So after forty nine spankings the principal looked down at the boy and said " How do you feel now?". The little boy screamed " My buns are on fire my buns are on fire!". The principal looked at the boy and said " All right lets see if i've straightened you up now. Where do I live?" the little boy sang " In the garbage In the garbage In the garbage"...
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The little boy is now in millitary school due to his abc accident.
Boy: Did it hurt?
Girl: Did what hurt?
Boy: When you fell from heaven.
Girl: Aww, did it hurt when you got kicked out of hell?
Boy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
Girl: Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put F more...
How many letters are in the alphabet?
There are 11 letters in "THE ALPHABET"
Did you say 26? :)