"Theatre Tickets" joke
A rather 'large' woman arrived at the theatre just before the performance began, and handed the usher two tickets.
"Where is the other party?" the usher asked.
Blushing, the woman explained, "Actually, both tickets are for me. You see, one seat is a little small for me and rather uncomfortable, so I bought two."
"That's fine with me, lady," said the usher, scratching his head. "There's just one problem though."
"Oh? What would that be?" the woman asked.
"Your seats are numbered forty-six and fifty-nine!" he replied.
A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn't budge.The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get more...
...doughnuts are in the official church budget.. ..they have to rope off the last pews in church so the front isn't empty.. ..you're watching "Star Wars" in the theatre and when they say, "May the force be with you," the theatre replies, "and also with more...
A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn't budge. The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get more...
The Godfather of Soul, James Brown, died Dec. 25th of congestive heart failure. However his corpse is still scheduled to tour.
12.28.06 Apollo Theatre New York, NY
12.30.06 James Brown Theatre Augusta, GA