"Top 10 Online Lies" joke

"I'm in this private room consoling a depressed friend".
"You're different... I've never felt like this about someone I've never met before."
"I'm new online and haven't had time to creat a profile... but tell me more about yourself."
"I never do cybersex! Yet here in this room alone with you, well I'm getting excited"
"Yes of course I'm female..."
"No this is my only screen name... You mean you can have more then one?"
"I'm 5'4, blonde hair, blue eyes and guys love my body!" Male version is "I'm 6'0, great tan, and buffed from working out"
"I'm not like most of the guy's here, I just want to meet so we can just have coffee and get to know each other" (at the hotel coffee shop)
"I don't care what you look like, it's whats on the inside that counts" (Which is true, except it means "I'm horny and could care less, just type)
And the number one Online lie is...
"Tonight my love... our souls have touched"