"What To Wear" joke
A man, called in for an audit by the IRS, asked his accountant and his lawyer what he should wear. "Wear casual clothing and an old pair of shoes. Don't let them think you are a wealthy man," the accountant replied.
The lawyer disagreed. "Wear your best suit and tie," he said. "Don't let them think they can intimidate you."
Confused, the man went to his minister, told him of the conflicting advice, and asked him what he should do. "Let me tell you a story," replied the minister. "A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night.' Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck and wool socks.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice: "Wear your most sexy, sheer negligee!"
"But Reverend," the man protested, "What does that have to do with the IRS?"
"It doesn't matter what you wear," the minister replied. "You're still going to get screwed."
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