"Women of the 90's" joke

1. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
2. A hard-on does not count as personal growth.
3. This isn't an office. Its Hell with fluorescent lighting.
4. Do I look like a fucking people person?
5. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
6. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
7. If I want to hear the patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.
8. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
9. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
10. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
11. What ever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
12. I am doing my best to imagine you with a personality.
13. Okay, okay I take it back. UnFuck you!
14. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
15. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
16. And which dwarf are you?
17. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
18. It's not the size that counts, it's the. .. no, it is the size.
19. Well today was a waste of makeup!