"You Might Be Cop" joke

You Might Be a Cop if...
* People shout, "I didn't do it!" when you walk into a room.
* Your idea of a good time is an armed robbery at shift change.
* You disbelieve 90% of what you hear and 75% of what you see.
* You believe the government should require a permit to reproduce.
* You believe prozac should be added regularly to the water system.
* When you mention vegetables, you're not referring to the food group.
* You want to hold a seminar entitled "Suicide - getting it right the first time."
* You call for a criminal record check on anyone who seems friendly toward you.
* You believe anyone who says, "I only had two beers" is going to blow over 150.
* You walk into places and people think it's high comedy to seize a co-worker and shout, "They've come to get you...".