"You might be a Republican if..." joke

You think "proletariat" is a type of cheese.
You're a pro-lifer, but support the death penalty.
You've ever uttered the phrase, "Why don't we just bomb the sons of bitches."
You've ever said, "I can't wait to get into business school."
You answer to "The Man."
You don't think "The Simpsons" is all that funny, but you watch it because that Flanders fellow makes a lot of sense.
You fax the FBI a list of "Commies in my Neighborhood."
You don't let your kids watch Sesame Street because you accuse Bert and Ernie of "sexual deviance."
You scream "Dit-dit-ditto" while making love.
You point to Hootie and the Blowfish as evidence of the end of racism in America.
You've ever said "Clean air? Looks clean to me."
You spend free time reading "The Bell Curve."
You've ever called the National Endowment for the Arts a bunch of pornographers.
You ever told a child that Oscar the Grouch "lives in a trash can because he is lazy and doesn't want to contribute to society."