"Children`s X-Mas Carols" joke

A teacher in Atlanta asked her students to write the words to their favorite Christmas Carols. She probably got fired for mentioning Christmas in school. Anyway here are some of the humorous lines she received:
Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly
We three kings of porridge and tar
On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me
Later on we`ll perspire, as we dream by the fire.
He`s makin a list, chicken and rice.
Noel. Noel, Barney`s the king of Israel.
With the jelly toast proclaim
Olive, the other reindeer. (all of the other reindeer)
Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say
Sleep in heavenly peas
In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he is sparse and brown
You`ll go down in listerine
Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay
O come, froggy faithful
You`ll tell Carol, "Be a skunk, I require"