"fingered" joke

I once fingered my daughter to the police.

I think it was every breath you take.

My mate Dave is serving a life sentence for something he didn't do.
He didn't wipe his fingerprints off the knife.

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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James H. H. Lampert:The biggest flaw in the common form of this joke is that the punchline makes no sense if "big sister" is the one who'd said that she wants to "put it in cider." Much better, something like "Everybody says that when big sister gets a prick . . . " or "Big Brother says that whenever Big Sister gets a prick . . . "
Funny Joke? 101 vote(s). 45% are positive. 1 comment(s).