Hot Jokes
Knock knock... cows
Hot 3 years agoPerson 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
Gas in the restaurant
Hot 3 years agoby Funny JI was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and noticed that everybody was staring at me....
Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
Bungee Jumping Mamma
Hot 3 years agoYour Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
Gullible cop
Hot 3 years agoby TJA cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the vehicle?
Driver: It's not my vehicle. I stole it.
Cop: Are you telling me this is a stolen car?
Driver: That's right. Mind you, now that I think of it, I believe I did see the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Cop: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yep. I put it there after I shot and killed the whoman who owns this car. Then I stuffed her in the trunk.
Cop: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.
When the cop heard this, he immediately called his captain. Within minutes, the car was surrounded by police and the captain approached the driver so he could handle the tense situation:
Captain: Sir, may more...
Santa Riddle
Hot 3 years agoWhy is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!
Restaurant order
Hot 3 years agoby AlexA guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.
"Yes?" she enquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?"
"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"
"Yes", she purrs, "I am."
The man replies "Well, go wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich!"
Yo Momma So Fat!
Hot 3 years agoYour momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.