104 Jokes / Recent Jokes
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not
been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and
that the Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to
walk up to his HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings,
he told his HR Manager his observation. The boss looked at him, laughed
and asked him to sit down saying; Myfriend, you have not worked here
for even one day.
The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to
explain.
Manager:- How many days are there in a year?
Man:- 365 days and some times 366
Manager:- how many hours make up a day?
Man:- 24 hours
Manager:- How long do you work in a day?
Man:- 8am to 4pm. i. e. 8 hours a day.
Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 more...
A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and that the Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation.
The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying, My friend, you have not worked here for even one day. The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager:- How many days are there in a year?
Man:- 365 days and some times 366
Manager:- how many hours make up a day?
Man:- 24 hours
Manager:- How long do you work in a day?
Man:- 8am to 4pm. i. e. 8 hours a day.
Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i. e. 1/3(one third)
Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 more...
A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.
She simply replied, "No peer pressure."
A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.
She simply replied, "No peer pressure."
The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.
I've sure gotten old. I've had two By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends.
But..... Thank God, I still have my Florida driver's license!
When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you will settle for being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team.