Accountant Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: Which end of the rope do you throw to a drowning accountant?
A: Both!
When do accountants laugh out loud? When somebody asks for a raise
A Mafia Godfather, accompanied by his attorney, walks into a
room to meet with his former accountant.
The Godfather asks the accountant, "Where is the 3 million bucks
you embezzled from me?" The accountant does not answer.
The Godfather asks again, "Where is the 3 million bucks you
embezzled from me?"
The attorney interrupts, "Sir, the man is a deaf mute and cannot
understand you, but I can interpret for you."
The Godfather says, "Well ask him where my damn money is!" The
attorney, using sign language, asks the accountant where the 3
million dollars is.
The accountant signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about."
The attorney interprets to the Godfather, "He doesn't know what
you are talking about."
The Godfather pulls out a 9 millimeter pistol, puts it to the
temple of the accountant, cocks the trigger and more...
Q:What's the definition of an accountant?
A:Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.
How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?"What kind of answer did you have in mind?"Two, one to change the light bulb and one to check that it was done within the given budget.
Laws of Accounting1. Trial balances dont2. Bank reconciliations never do3. Working Capital does not4. Return on Investments never will