Architect Jokes / Recent Jokes

The architect, the artist and the engineer were discussing whether it was better to have a wife or a mistress.
The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.
The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.
The engineer said "I like both"
"Both?"
Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will both assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go into the lab and get some work done."

An architect, an artist and an accountant were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.
The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.
The accountant said, "I like both."
"Both?"
The accountant replied "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the office and get some work done."

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said that he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.
The artist said he enjoyed spending time with this mistress, because of the passion and the mystery he found there.
The engineer said, "I like both."
"Both?"
Engineer: "Yeah, if you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you're spending time with the other woman and you can go to the lab and get some work done."

Three Jewish Grandmothers were sitting around, drinking tea and talking about their grandsons' professions. One was a doctor, the second an architect, and the third a computer scientist. The Grandmothers got to arguing about whose profession was the oldest.
In the course of their arguments, they got all the way back to the Garden of Eden, whereupon the doctor's Grandma said, "The medical profession is clearly the oldest, because Eve was made from Adam's rib, as the story goes, and that was a simply incredible surgical feat."
The architect's Grannie did not agree. She said, "But if you look at the Garden itself, in the beginning there was chaos and void, and out of that, the Garden and the world were created. So G-d must have been an architect."
The computer scientist's Bubbie, who had listened to all of this said, "Yes, but where do you think the chaos came from?"

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said, "I enjoyed time with my wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.
The artist said, "I enjoyed time with my mistress, because of the passion and mystery I found there.

Dear Mr. Architect,

Please design and build me a house. I am not quite sure of what I need, so you should use your discretion.

My house should have between two and forty-five bedrooms. Just make sure the plans are such that the bedrooms can be easily added or deleted. When you bring the blueprints to me, I will make the final decision of what I want. Also, bring me the cost breakdown for each configuration so that I can arbitrarily pick one.

Keep in mind that the house I ultimately choose must cost less than the one I am currently living in. Make sure, however, that you correct all the deficiencies that exist in my current house (the floor of my kitchen vibrates when I walk across it, and the walls don`t have nearly enough insulation in them).

As you design, also keep in mind that I want to keep yearly maintenance costs as low as possible. This should mean the incorporation of extra-cost features like aluminum, vinyl, or composite siding. more...

A doctor, an architect, and an attorney were dining at the country club one day, and the conversation turned to the subject of their respective dogs, which were apparently quite extraordinary. A wager was placed on who had the most intelligent dog.
The physician offered to show his dog first, and called to the parking lot, "Hippocrates, come!" Hippocrates ran in, and was told by the doctor to do his stuff. Hippocrates ran to the golf course and dug for a while, producing a number of bones. He dragged the bones into the country club, and assembled them into a complete, fully articulated human skeleton. The physician patted Hippocrates on the head, and gave him a cookie for his efforts.
The architect was only marginally impressed, and called for his dog, "Sliderule, come!" Sliderule ran in, and was told to do his stuff. The dog immediately chewed the skeleton to rubble, but reassembled the fragments into a scale model of the Taj Mahal. The architect patted more...