Audience Jokes / Recent Jokes

"WHO WANTS TO WIN AN IRAQI OIL WELL".
This is how the game is played. A contestant will be required to pick the correct answer out of 4 possible answers. For each correct answer chosen, a contestant wins money. There are 16 steps to winning the oil well. From 1 through 15, the contestant wins a monetary price. The final question, number 16, if answered correctly, wins the contestant an oil well in Iraq. If at any level you fail to correctly answer a question or are unable to answer a question, you automatically are eliminated from the contest.
A contestant has three life lines to use at any time during the contest, and the life lines may used in any combination at any time. The life lines are:
A. Ask the studio audience.
(B) Use a 50/50, in which case two wrong answers are removed from the four answers.
(B) Phone a friend for help.
Host: Our first contestant is Georgie Boy. Welcome to the show, Georgie Boy. What do you do for a living? Do you more...

"WHO WANTS TO WIN AN OIL WELL".
This is how the game is played. A contestant will be required to pick the correct answer out of 4 possible answers. For each correct answer chosen, a contestant wins money. There are 16 steps to winning the oil well. From 1 through 15, the contestant wins a monetary price. The final question, number 16, if answered correctly, wins the contestant an oil well in Iraq. If at any level you fail to correctly answer a question or are unable to answer a question, you automatically are eliminated from the contest.
A contestant has three life lines to use at any time during the contest, and the life lines may used in any combination at any time. The life lines are:
A. Ask the studio audience.
(B) Use a 50/50, in which case two wrong answers are removed from the four answers.
(B) Phone a friend for help.
Host: Our first contestant is Georgie Boy. Welcome to the show, Georgie Boy. What do you do for a living? Do you want to more...

The following, said to be a true story as seen by millions of viewers on a Spanish T.V. Channel:

The parents of a teenage girl decided to put their daughter's name forward for a Surprise Game Show - she idolised Teen-Age Pop Star "Ricky Martin", and they arranged for TV cameras to be placed throughout the house.

The house was then left empty with Ricky Martin hidden in the wardrobe in the girls bedroom - all set to give the daughter a wonderful surprise. However, upon returning home from school and finding the house empty, the daughter made her way down to the kitchen where she opened the fridge and removed a tin of pate - at this stage the live TV audience is wondering "what the hell is going on?

She then went back upstairs to her bedroom where she proceeded to remove all her clothes and spread pate all over her triangle of womanhood (at this stage Ricky Martin is still hidden inside the wardrobe, and half of Spain is seeing a young more...

President Ronald Regan told this joke about Fidel Castro:
Castro was addressing a large audience in Cuba, and he began, "They accuse me of intervening in Angola..." and a man going through the audience called out, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"
Castro went on: "They say I'm intervening in Mozambique..." and the same loud voice shouted, "Peanuts! Popcorn!
Castro continued: "They say I'm intervening in Nicaragua..." and the voice yelled again, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"
By this time Castro was boiling mad and he sputtered, "Bring that man who is shouting 'Peanuts! Popcorn!' to me, and I'll kick him all the way to Miami."
And everybody in the audience started shouting, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"

President Ronald Regan told this joke about Fidel Castro:Castro was addressing a large audience in Cuba, and he began, "They accuse me of intervening in Angola..." and a man going through the audience called out, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"Castro went on: "They say I'm intervening in Mozambique..." and the same loud voice shouted, "Peanuts! Popcorn! Castro continued: "They say I'm intervening in Nicaragua..." and the voice yelled again, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"By this time Castro was boiling mad and he sputtered, "Bring that man who is shouting 'Peanuts! Popcorn!' to me, and I'll kick him all the way to Miami."And everybody in the audience started shouting, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"

Castro was addressing a large audience in Cuba, and he began, "They accuse me of intervening in Angola..." and a man going through the audience called out, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"
Castro went on: "They say I'm intervening in Mozambique..." and the same loud voice shouted, "Peanuts! Popcorn!
Castro continued: "They say I'm intervening in Nicaragua..." and the voice yelled again, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"
By this time Castro was boiling mad and he sputtered, "Bring that man who is shouting' Peanuts! Popcorn!' to me, and I'll kick him all the way to Miami."
And everybody in the audience started shouting, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"

Finally, Jack had made it to the last round of the $5,000,000 Question. The night prior to the big question, he advised the show's host that he desired a question in American History.
When the big night arrived, Jack made his way on stage in front of the studio and TV audience. He was the best guest the show had ever seen and had become the talk of the town. The host stepped up to the mic.
"Jack, for your final question you have chosen American History. If you answer this question correctly, you will walk away $5,000,000 richer. Are you ready?"
Jack nodded with a cocky confidence and the crowd went wild. He hadn't missed a question all week.
"Jack, your American History question is a two-part question. As you are already aware, you may answer either part first. As a rule, the second half of the question is always easier. Which part would you prefer to take a stab at first?" said the host.
Jack was now becoming more noticeably nervous. He more...