Barber Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young girl is sitting in a barber shop with her mother, eating a twinkie, and anxiously awaiting her first hair cut. When her turn comes, she brings her twinkie with her to the chair, and the barber covers her. Soon, she pulls the twinkie out for a bite. "You're getting hair on your twinkie," the barber playfully warns. "Yes, I know," replies the girl. "And I'm getting boobs, too."

During his monthly visit to the corner barbershop, this fellow asked his barber for any suggestions on how to treat his increasing baldness.
After a brief pause, the barber leaned over and confided that the best thing he'd come across was, female juices.
"But you're balder than I am," protested the customer.
"True," admitted the barber, "but you've gotta admit I've got one hell of a mustache!"

A priest went into a Washington, D. C., barbershop, got his hair cut and asked how much he owed.
"No charge, Father," the barber said. "I consider it a service to the Lord." when the barber arrived at his shop the next morning, he found a dozen small prayer booklets on the stoop along with a thank you note from the priest.
A few days later a police officer came in. "How much do I owe you?" the cop asked after his haircut.
"No charge, officer," the barber answered. "I consider it a service to my community." The next morning the barber found a dozen doughnuts on the stoop along with a thank you note from the police officer.
A few days after that, a Senator walked in for a haircut. "How much do I owe you?" he asked afterward.
"No charge," the barber replied. "I consider it a service to my country." The next morning when he arrived at the shop, the barber found a dozen Senators waiting more...

A barber gave a haircut to a priest one day. The priest tried to pay for the haircut, but the barber refused, saying, "you do God? s work." The next morning the barber found a dozen bibles at the door to his shop. A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused to pay, saying, "you protect the public." The next morning the barber found a dozen doughnuts at the door to his shop. A lawyer came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused payment, saying, "you serve the justice system." The next morning the barber found a dozen lawyers waiting for a free haircut.

This guy goes into a barber shop, and says, "I want my hair cut, so that it's long here, here, here, and here..., sort of wavy in this section but straight just below, sort of spiked on this diagonal with a slanted taper, and bald patches here, here, here, and here." The barber looked at him and said, "I don't think I can do that!" "Why not?" said the guy. "You did the last time I was here!"

A priest went into a Washington, D.C. barbershop and got his hair cut. He then asked asked how much he owed the barber. "No charge, Father," the barber said. "I consider it a service to the Lord." when the barber arrived at his shop the next morning, he found a dozen small prayer booklets on the stoop along with a thank you note from the priest.

A few days later, a police officer came in. "How much do I owe you?" the cop asked after his haircut. "No charge, officer," the barber answered. "I consider it a service to my community." The next morning the barber found a dozen doughnuts on the stoop along with a thank you note from the police officer.

A few days after that, a Senator walked in for a haircut. "How much do I owe you?" he asked afterward. "No charge," the barber replied. "I consider it a service to my country." The next morning when he arrived at the shop, the barber found a more...

A barber's neighbour frequently went to his shop, wished him, and inquired about the time it would take for his turn to come and walk'away. After this ritual went on for some time the barber grew suspicious and followed his neighbour. Tie gentleman was found in barber's house with his better half literally following the commandment "love thy neighbour".