Between Jokes / Recent Jokes

Tuan comes up to the border between Vietnam and China on his bicycle. He has two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?" "Rice," answered Tuan. The guard says, "We'll just see about that. Get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but rice. He detains Tuan overnight and has the rice analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure rice in the bags The guard releases Tuan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border. A week later, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?" "Rice," says Tuan. The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but rice. He gives the sand back to Tuan, and Tuan crosses the border on his bicycle. This sequence of events if repeated every day for three years. Finally, Tuan doesn't show up more...

Sardarji went to a logic school to learn logic. "To begin with, I'll explain you the term logic with the help of an example," the Professor said.
"Do you have a fish pond?" asked the Professor.
"Yes," said Sardarji.
"This means you love fish," the Professor continued.
"Yes."
"That is you love water."
"Yes."
"Everybody drinks water, meaning you love everybody."
"Yes."
"This means you love a boy."
"Yes."
"So you love a girl."
"Yes."
"If you love a girl, then you are a boy."
"Yes, I am a boy."
"And if you are a boy, you are not homosexual."
"Yes, true, I am not a homosexual," said Sardarji.
"So this is the logical relationship between a fish pond and homosexual," the Professor ended.
That night Sardarji could not sleep more...

Q: What is the difference between Liverpool football and a tea bag? A: The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a brick? A: When you lay a brick it doesnt follow you around for two weeks whining.

* What is the diffirence between a condom and a cow?
- The one is a pullover and the other is a jersey.

* What is the diffirence between a condom and a coffin?
- You come in the one and you go in the other.

* What is the diffirence between a condom and a man?
- The one has balls and the other hasn't.

Q: What's the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit? A: One's a glueless kit and the other's a clueless git!

Whats the difference between a rooster and a hooker? a rooster says cocka-doodle-doo a hooker says any cock will do.