Biological Jokes / Recent Jokes

"Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?" a little girl asked. "No, I don't think so. Fifi is in heat," replied the mother. "What does that mean?" asked the child. Embarrassed and not wanting to get into a biological discussion with her young daughter, the Mother said, "Oh, just go ask your father. I think he is in the garage."
The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Fifi for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said that Fifi was in heat, and that I had to come talk to you." Not wanting to have the biological discussion either, the father said, "Bring Fifi over here." He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's rear end with it. "Okay, now you can go for a walk but keep Fifi on the leash and you can only go around the block once."
The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later with NO DOG on the leash. "Where is Fifi?" her more...

Some biological researcher experimented with a flea. He puts it on the table and says: "Jump!"
The flea jumps 3 meters, so he writes down to his log: "The flea has jumped 3 meters."
Afterwards he cuts one of its legs off and says again: "Jump!"
The flea jumps only 2 meters, so he writes down to the log: "The flea has jumped 2 meters."
Then he again cuts one more leg, again says: "Jump!"
It jumped 1.5 meters, which was also registered in the log.
He continued cutting the fleas' legs until there were no legs left, he puts it on the table and says: "Jump!"
The flea doesn't move.
He says again: "Jump!"
It doesn't move.
So he writes down "After removing all legs of the flea, the flea loses its ability to hear."

A California couple discovered the wife was pregnant, but the family simply couldn't afford any more children. They looked around and found an excellent Hispanic family to adopt the child. Then they found out she was going to have twins. Fortunately, a family of Arab Americans agreed to adopt the other child. Twin healthy boys were born and passed along to the families, who named them Juan and Amal.
The biological parents kept in close touch with the adoptive parents in a very amicable relationships. One day, Juan's family sent a picture of the youth in his baseball uniform. The biological mother was so proud of her son. She said to her husband, "He is so handsome! I wish we had a picture like this of our other son, too."
He replied, "But dear, they are twins. When you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!"

At a convention of biological scientists one researcher remarks to another, "Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?" "Really?" the other replied, "Why did you switch?" "Well, for three reasons. First we found that lawyers are far more plentiful, second, the lab assistants don't get so attached to them, and thirdly there are some things even a rat won't do. However, sometimes it very hard to extrapolate our test results to human beings."

At a convention of biological scientists one researcher remarks to another, "Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?"
"Really?" the other replied, "Why did you switch?"
"Well, for three reasons. First, we found that lawyers are far more plentiful. Second, the lab assistants don't get so attached to them. And third, there are some things even a rat won't do. However, sometimes it very hard to exterpolate our test results to human beings."