Blocks Jokes / Recent Jokes
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat.The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price. "Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and an extra thousand dollars more for the story behind it.""You can keep the story, old man," he replies, "but, I'll take the rat."The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him.Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even faster, and soon breaks more...
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs.
"Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it."
"You can keep the story, old man," he replies, "but I'll take the rat."
The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him. Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even more...
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs. "Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it." "You can keep the story, old man," he replies, "but I'll take the rat." The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him. Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even faster, and more...
A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day, he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away and the same again. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further and the darn
cat would always beat him home.At last, he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there... Hours later, the man calls home to his wife."Jen, is the cat there?""Yes", the wife answers..."why do you ask?"Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that son of a **** on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!"
A tourist wanders into a back-alley San Francisco antique shop and sees a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. Finding the sculpture so interesting and unique, he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price.
"Ten dollars for the rat, sir, "says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it."
"Keep the story, old man," he says, "but I will take the rat."
The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him.
Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but each time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout.
He walks even faster, and soon breaks into a trot, as multitudes of rats swarm more...
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display, he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs.
"Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it."
"You can keep the story, old man," he replies, "but I'll take the rat."
The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him. Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster. But every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point more...
Jack absolutely hated his wife's cat, so he decided to get rid of him. He put the cat in the car, drove about twenty or so blocks from his home, and left the cat at the park.
When he returned home and was about to enter his driveway, there was the cat sitting in the middle of it.
The following day, he tried again. He put the cat in the car and, this time, drove about forty blocks from home and left the cat there.
As he was driving back into his driveway, there was the cat!
Each day he would try again, taking the cat farther and farther away, but the darn cat would always beat him home.
Finally, he put the cat in the car and decided to drive several miles away, turned right, then left, went over the bridge, left again, then another left, then a right and so on until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from home and left the cat there.
Several hours later, Jack called his wife. "Hi, honey, is the cat there?"
"Yes," his wife more...