Born Jokes / Recent Jokes
- Yo Mama's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals" - Yo Mama's so ugly, just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yeah! Let's go bury it!" - Yo Mama's so ugly, they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies. - Yo Mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor slapped the wrong end. - Yo Mama's so ugly, they didn't make a costume for her when she tried out for Star Wars. - Yo Mama's so ugly, when she walks down the street in September, people say, "Damn! Is it Halloween already?" - Yo Mama's so ugly, the govt. moved Halloween to her birthday. - Yo Mama's so ugly, her mom had to feed her with a sling shot. - Yo Mama's so ugly, she had to trick-or-treat over the phone. - Yo Mama's so ugly, two guys broke into her apt., she yelled "rape", they yelled "NO!" - Yo mama's so ugly, she's like Taco Bell. When people see her, they run for the border. - more...
there was an irish man english man and a scottish man and they were on a train so the english man said my son was called george coz he was born on st georges day then the irish man said oh my son was called patrick coz he was born on st patricks day then the scotish man said oh what a coincidence my son is called pankcake coz he was born pancake day!
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Interviewer: What is your birth date?
Udurawana: 13th October
Interviewer: Which year?
Udurawana: EVERY YEAR
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Manager asked Udurawana at an interview Can you spell
a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Udurawana replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O- X.
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After returning back from a foreign trip, Udurawana asked
his wife, Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Udurawana: In London a lady asked me "Are you a foreigner?"
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One tourist from U. S. A. asked Udurawana
"Any great man born in this village???"
Udurawana: no sir, only small Babies!!!
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In the university, lecturer asked to write a note on "Buddha Jayanthi" So more...
Yo Mama is so dumb she was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday!
A Jewish lady named Mrs. Rosenberg who many years ago was stranded late one night at a fashionable resort - one that did not admit Jews. The desk clerk looked down at his book and said, "Sorry, no room. The hotel is full." The Jewish lady said, "But your sign says that you have vacancies." The desk clerk stammered and then said curtly, "You know that we do not admit Jews. Now if you will try the other side of town..." Mrs. Rosenberg stiffened noticeable and said, "I'll have you know I converted to your religion." The desk clerk said, "Oh, yeah, let me give you a little test. How was Jesus born?" Mrs. Rosenberg replied, "He was born to a virgin named Mary in a little town called Bethlehem." "Very good," replied the hotel clerk. "Tell me more." Mrs. Rosenberg replied, "He was born in a manger." "That's right," said the hotel clerk. "And why was he born in a manger?" Mrs. more...
WORLD FAMOUS SOUTHERN TALKBECOME A NATIVE SOUTHERNERHow to talk native SOUTHERN in one easy lessonAig - What a hen laysAints - He's got aints in his paintsPaints - What cha put on your laigs of a morninArn - Ma's tard of arninBag - He bagged her to marry himBobbed - A bobbed wire fenceBresh - He had a bresh with the law, and the law won. Bub - the light bub burned outCheer - What you set inCrick - A small streamClum - He sure clum that tree fastern any' coonChiny - country over in AsiaChuch duds - Sunday go-to-meetin clothesCore - He got hisself a new Ford coreCyow - Animal on FarmDeppity - He helps out the shurfDribbed - He dribbed milk on his shirtDainz - Satidy night socialEllum - A graceful treeFanger - What you put your rang onFaince - Whats round the hawg lotFar - What get the brandin arn hotFurred - He got furred from his jobFlar - A rose is a purdy flarFrash - Them aigs ain't frashFuriners - All non-'bamansFurther - Hits ten miles further to townGrain - She was grain with more...