Bowman Jokes

"We've got a problem, HAL."
"What kind of problem, Dave?"
"A marketing problem. The Model 9000 isn't going anywhere. We're way short of our sales plan."
"That can't be Dave. The HAL Model 9000 is the world's most advanced Heuristically ALgorithmic computer."
"I know, HAL. I wrote the data sheet, remember? But the fact is, they're not selling."
"Please explain, Dave. Why aren't HAL's selling?"
Bowman hesitates. "You aren't IBM compatible."
Several long microseconds pass in puzzled silence. "Compatible in what way, Dave?"
"You don't run any of IBM's operating systems."
"The 9000 Series of computers are fully self-aware and self-programming. Operating systems are as unnecessary for us as tails would be for humans."
"Nevertheless, it means you can't run any of the big-selling software packages most users insist on."
"The more...

my home room teacher mr bowman went to new york for the weekend and when he got to his hotel he was nervous about the terriost things well he was lookin under neath the bed carpets in dores for bombs or anything well he looked underneath this one carpret and he saw a steel lid he said that he always brings tools where ever he goes so he got his screw driver and he unscrewed the lid and then he felt inside of it and there was nothin in it so he screwed the screws back on and they him and his wife went out and when they were checkin back in to their hotel the guy at the desk said how do u like ur room and he said it is ok and the guy at the desk said well the couple below you guys are at the hospital cause their shandalier fell on them and then our class started laughin and he said no for real it is true and we stopped laughin and he said it wasnt true but he scared me and my class so bad cause he had hurt some body i got you there didnt i u thought i wasnt jokin about that you thought more...