Boys Jokes / Recent Jokes
There's a little fellow named Junior who hangs out at Tim's Grocery Store.
The owner Tim doesn't know what Junior's problem is, but the boys like to tease him. They say he is two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles shy of a barrel.
To prove it, sometimes they offer Junior his choice between a nickel and a dime. He always takes the nickel - they say - because it's bigger.
One day after Junior grabbed the nickel, Tim got him off to one side and said, "Junior, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
And Junior said, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd quit doing it!"
HOW TO DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (as answered by primary school students)
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
Kirsten, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
23 is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. Camille, age 10
No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
Freddie, age 6
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, like maybe if they were yelling at the same kids.
Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids.
Lori, age 8
WHAT DO more...
Two privates stationed at Fort Campbell were handed shovels
and told to bury a large, dead animal. While digging they
got into an argument about what they were burying.
"This here's a big mule!" "This ain't no mule, this here's
a donkey."
"Mule!"
"Donkey!"
Well, this went on for a while until the camp chaplain came by.
"What are you boys doing?"
"We're diggin' a grave for this mule."
"Donkey, dammit!"
The chaplain cut in, "Boys, this isn't either one, it's an ass!"
An hour later, the camp commander came up and said, "What are
you men doing, digging a foxhole?"
"No sir, we're diggin' an asshole."
A woman had 8 children, all of them boys. So, one day a magazine sent a journalist to her house for an interview. He asked her about the boys and what their names were; she sid' Kevin'.' Right', he said,' what about that blond one over there?'' Kevin', she said.' Oh, and the tall one with the freckles?'' Kevin', she said.' Well, and the little chubby one with the baseball cap?'' Kevin', she said.' Are all your boys called Kevin?' he asked,' isn't that terribly complicated?'' Not at all', she said,' it makes everything very easy, actually. When I shout: Kevin, tea is ready!, they all come. When I say: Kevin, it's time for bed!, they all go to bed.'' I see. But what if you want only one of them?'' No problem.' she answers.' Then I call them by their surnames.'
A couple had two little mischievous boys, ages 8 and 10. They were always getting into trouble, and their parents knew that if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons would get the blame. The boys' mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The clergyman agreed and asked to see them individually. So, the mother sent her 8-year-old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the clergyman in the afternoon. The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?" They boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there with his mouth hanging open. The clergyman repeated the question. "Where is God?" Again, the boy made no attempt to answer. So, the clergyman raised his voice some more and shook his finger i n the boy's face and bellowed, "Where is God!?" The boy screamed and bolted from the more...
A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very smallboy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him toreach. After watching the boys efforts for some time, the priest moves closer tothe boys position. He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives thedoorbell a sold ring. Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently andasks, "And now what, my little man?" To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"
One fine day in the middle of class at school, a girl raised her asking to be excused: "Teacher, can I answer the call of nature?" Knowing what the kid wanted, the teacher said okay. Immediately, the girl ran to the toilet. But, within a minute, she was back. Another girl was shocked by how she could actually take care of business so quickly, and asked how she managed to do it so fact.The girl responded, "It was a prank call."
Tale of the Two Dead Boys "One fine day in the middle of the night, two dead boys got up to fight,
Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other.
The deaf policeman heard the noise, and came and shot those two dead boys.
If you don't believe this joke is true, ask the blind man, he saw it too!