Break Jokes / Recent Jokes

Pulling up to the toll both Jack handed the collector a $100.00 bill.Looking incredulously at the bill, the collector, in a snappy tone, exclaimed "I can't break this! I need exact change.""Come on buddy." Jack pleaded, "Can't you give me a break, just this once?""Nope. Sorry. Exact change!" Answered the collector."While thumbing through the change in his ashtray Jack asked the collector, "Do you really like this job?""Well it's not the best job that I've ever had, but it pays the bills," replied the collector. "what do you do for a living?" he asked.Still counting change and without looking up Jack said, "I'm a rectum stretcher.""A what?" asked the collector."A rectum stretcher." Jack replied, giving the collector a slideways glance."What does a rectum stretcher do?" The collector asked."Well just as the name implies, I stretch rectums." Jack explained setting more...

Two blondes went to the market where they each bought a horse. When they got home, they were discussing how they would tell their horses apart. They decided to cut the tail off of one. That worked for a short time, but the tail grew back, so they decided they would break one of the horses' legs.
One of the blondes looked at the other and asked, "Which one of the horses should we break the leg of, the white one or the brown one?"

You don't have any luck at all if:
-The guarantee on your used car expires two hours before the car's engine does.
- You start to go bald at the same time you reach puberty.
-You get your BIG break and make the football team only to trip over the bench and break your leg.
-You find a ten-dollar bill and get arrested when you try to spend it because it's counterfeit.

Two blondes went to the market. While they were there, they each bought a horse. When they got home, they discussed how to tell their horses apart. They decided to cut the tail off of one. That worked for a while, but soon the tail grew back, so they decided that they would break one of the horses' legs. One of the blondes said, "Which of the horses should we break the leg off of, the brown one or the white one?"

The current stimulus package before Congress contains tax breaks for purchasing a home and buying a new car. So I plan to get a double tax break by buying a new Chevy van and living in it.

It was the first day of the school year and the teacher was asking her first grade students their names. "What is your name?" she asked a little boy in the first row.
"Peter Break," the little boy gleefully answered.
The teacher said, "Young man, I don't think that's your name. Now, what is your real name?"
Again, the little boy responded, "Peter Break."
Frustrated, the teacher went to the principal's office and asked, "Mr. Jones, do we have a Peter Break here?"
The principal replied, "Heck, we don't even have time for a coffee break here!"

Ebonics Version of Windows' 98 Ebonics Version of Windows' 98 Debuts!
Microsoft has announced that its special Ebonics version of Windows 98, titled "It be a fresh Window." It has been leaked to several suburbs, causing confusion for unsuspecting users.
There are numerous differences between Windows 98 and the Ebonics version.
When opening the Ebonics version, the familiar windows chime is replaced With a "phat getto track that melts' em down wit dope-ass bass," The opening screen features a Windows logo that is spray painted on a brick wall - along with several gangsta signs, slogans and shout outs.
On the main screen, My Computer is replaced with "Dis My Shit."
The Recycle Bin has been replaced with a Goodwill dumpster.
If users are logged on to a network, the Network Neighborhood is replaced With "Da Hood."
Users have their choice of two animated screen savers: "Marquee," a lil' G spray- painting more...