Burgler Jokes

Late one night, a burgler broke into a house. As he tiptoed through the living room, he heard a voice say: "Jesus is watching you!"
Nothing happened, so the burgler crept forward again. "Jesus is watching you" - said the voice.
The burgler stopped dead in his tracks. He looked around. In a dark corner he spotted a bird cage with a parrot in it.
"Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?" he asked.
"Yes" said the parrot.
The burgler breathed a sigh of relief, then asked the parrot, "What's your name?"
"Clarence" answered the bird. "That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burgler. "What idiot named you Clarence?"
The parrot's answer: "The same idiot who named the Bulldog, Jesus."

A burgler enters a policeman's house to steal. The wife wakes up and shakes her husband to wake up.
Wife: Look a burgler has come in our house. Catch him and take him to police station.
Husband: Dear, I am not on duty. Sleep now and I will take care of it in the morning.