Cardinals Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Arizona Cardinals have won their first NFC Championship since 1947. Ironically enough, that was Kurt Warners rookie year.

The Pope met with his Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Benjamin Netanyahu, the leader of Israel. "Your Holiness", said one of his Cardinals, "Mr. Netanyahu wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic faiths."

The Pope thought this was a good idea, but he had never held a golf club in his hand. "Don't we have a Cardinal to represent me?" he asked.

"None that plays very well," a Cardinal replied. "But," he added, "there is a man named Jack Nicklaus, an American golfer who is a devout Catholic.

We can offer to make him a Cardinal, then ask him to play Mr. Netanyahu as your personal representative. In addition to showing our spirit of cooperation, we'll also win the match."

Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made. Of course, Nicklaus was honored and agreed to play. The day after the match, more...

Two young met while studying in seminary, Matthew Anderson and Anthony Sicola. They become great friends, but also become very competitive between each other. They both graduate #1 and #2 in their class, with Anthony being #1 and Matthew being #2. They then both go to their new parishes, which instantly become hugely popular. For years the two of them rise through the ranks of the Catholic Church, becoming bishops, arch-bishops, and cardinals around the same time. Always though, Anthony is considered the slightly better of the two.
Eventually, the reigning Pope passes away, and the College of Cardinals is convened to choose the next Pope. They debate for days until the list is down to just two names, Anthony and Matthew. After another day or two of deliberation, the white smoke is seen, and they make the announcement, Matthew Anderson will be the next Pope.
Anthony, happy for his friend, is perturbed because he knows in his heart that he is better and would make a better Pope. more...

A bunch of Cardinals got together with the Pope and decided that they wanted to have a golf game against the other religions. The only problem was that none of the cardinals were very good golfers.
One Cardninal turned to the Pope and suggested, "We could get Tiger Woods and ordane him as a Cardinal. He would ensure our victory."
"That's a great idea", said the Pope.
A few weeks later, the cardinals returned from their golf game and the Pope was anxiously awaiting the news of the match.
"So, how did it go?" asked the Pope.
One of the cardinals replied, "Well, it went alright. We played pretty well, but we lost."
"How could you lose? We had Tiger Woods as our secret weapon." gasped the Pope.
The cardinal shook his head and replied, "Tiger lost to Rabbi Greg Norman!"

The Arizona Cardinals plan to donate thousands of Super Bowl "championship" T-shirts to poor families in El Salvador. Which will be easy, since that's where the shirts are made.

The Pope met with his cardinals to discuss a proposal from Benjamin Netanyahu, the leader of Israel.
"Your Holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Netanyahu wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic faiths.