Caruthers Jokes

Posted in a foreign country, a young soldier was greeted by the colonel of his new regiment. "You'll like it here, Caruthers," he said. "We keep ourselves enter­tained. On Monday we have a high-stakes poker session and..." "I don't gamble, sir," interrupted Caruthers. "Never mind. Tuesday is drinking night." "I don't drink, sir," said Caruthers. "I've taken the pledge." "OK," said the colonel. "Maybe Wednesday is up your street. Girls from the village entertain us, if you know what I mean." "I don't go with loose women," said Caruthers. "Look here!" barked the colonel. "You're not queer, lad, are you?" "Certainly not," replied Caruthers. "Ah, well," sighed the colonel. "Then you won't like Thursday night either."