Cashier Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two little boys go into the grocery store. One is nine, one is four. The nine-year-old grabs a box of tampons from the shelf and carries it to the register for check-out. The cashier asks "Oh, these must be for your mom, huh?" The nine-year-old replies, "Nope, not for my mom." Without thinking, the cashier responded, "Well, they must be for your sister then?" The nine-year-old responded, "Nope, not for my sister either." The cashier had now become curious. "Oh. Not for your mom and not for your sister -- then who are they for?" The nine-year old says "They're for my four-year-old little brother." The cashier is surprised: "Your four year-old-brother?" The nine-year-old explains: "Well yeah, they say on TV if you wear one of these, you can swim or ride a bike -- and my little brother can't do either of those things."

Every day, we are assaulted by stories of stupid people -- many of whom use their stupidity for personal gain. From time to time, though, we hear of those who strive to achieve new levels of stupidity *while* also breaking the law. To these brave men and women -- ooops, "women and men" -- we present the highest possible honor: entry into the "Stupid-Criminal Hall of Shame."
Following are their accounts. .
Kentucky (where else?): Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off their truck. Scared, they left the scene and drove home. With the chain still attached to the machine. With their bumper still attached to the chain. With their vehicle's license plate still attached to the bumper.
South Carolina: A man walked into a local police station, dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, more...

I was at the drugstore and noticed a young male cashier staring at the pretty girl in front of me. Her total came to $16. 42, and
after handing over a $100 bill, she waited for change. "Here you go," said the cashier, smiling as he returned the proper amount. "Have a great day!"
Now I placed my items on the counter. The tally was $32. 79, and I too gave the cashier a $100 bill.
"I'm sorry, Ma'am. We can't accept anything larger than a fifty," he told me, pointing to a sign stating store policy.
"But you just accepted that last girl's hundred," I reasoned.
"I had to," he said. "It had her phone number on it."

An Indian gentleman on his first visit to the USA visited the foreignexchange to exchange some Rupees. He handed to the cashier 100, 000Rpsand after a quick calculation on the calculator, was given $50. 45 witha typical "service" smile and "Have a nice day!"The Indian promptly spent this and returned the next day with anotherwad of Rupees. He handed the same cashier 100, 000Rps and put his handout for his $50. 45, instead he received $48. 78. He questiond bitterly Ooh! vy less! !??" Whereupon the cashier replied"Fluctuations!"He screamed back "FLUCK YOU AMERICANS, TOO!" I'm going back to Delhi!!!

A blonde walks into a pawn shop and says "can i buy that t.v". The cashier says I dont serve blondes. So the blonde goes home and dyes her hair red. She comes back the next day and asked the same question. The cashier again says we dont serve blondes. So she goes home and dyes her hair brown. The same thing happened the next day. She is so ticked off that she says "how the heck do you know i am a blonde?" and the cashier replies "because thats not a t.v its a microwave!"

"Cash, check or charge?" the cashier asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As the woman fumbled for her wallet, the cashier noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"Do you always carry your TV remote?" the cashier asked.
"No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him."

This blonde walked into a party store and asked the cashier if he had a hanger or something to unlock her car because she locked her keys in the car. He nodded and handed her a hanger. She thanked him and went outside to set to work. A little while later the cashier decided to check on her and saw her working at it and another blonde in the car was saying "a little to the left... no, a little to the right..."