Casualty Jokes / Recent Jokes

Driving Lesson: Shanavas was just past 18 years. He wanted to learn how to drive a car. So he approached Shamudeen. Shamudeen agreed and he taught him for a month. At the end of the month, when there was just one more lesson to be finished, Shamu said "Shanavas, you are doing very well. This is the last lesson about the use of Indicators. After finishing the lesson, you drive alone to the city and come back." Shanavas nodded. After the lesson was over, he drove the car towards the main road. Fifteen minutes later, Shamu got a call from the Medical College casualty that Shanavas was admitted after a R. T. A. He rushed to the Casualty and found Shanavas lying in the trolley wih lots of bruises. Seeing Shamu, Shanavas went mad and shouted. "What man? What did you teach me? A vehicle with an indicator on top came rushing just after the Ulloor junction. I thought it would go up. But it came and crashed on to the car!" (The vehicle was an Ambulance!)

MASSIVE TUMOUR

In October 1991, surgeons at Stanford University Hospital removed an ovarian tumour weighing over 21 stone from a woman. It was the largest cyst ever detached from a human being. After the operation, the woman weighed 5 stone LESS than the tumour.



BABY CHICKEN

A 50 year old woman was brought into a New York emergency room complaining of abdominal pains. During an examination, doctors found that the woman's labia were pinned together with old safety pins. Further inside, they found the dismembered body of a chicken. The woman explained that she inserted the chicken pieces, convinced that they would grow into a baby.



INNER SKELETON

A 63 year old widow was admitted to hospital in Recife, Brazil suffering abdominal pains. X-rays showed that she was carrying a 20 inch long skeleton of a foetus which she conceived a decade earlier. It had become lodged outside the womb and was never expelled from more...