Center Jokes / Recent Jokes
On 26th Dec' 04 early morning several hrs before the catastrophy happened, Honolulu Tsunami Monitoring center have been trying to call our Meteorological Dept. monitoring center in Palekelle and Colombo but failed.
They also got in touch with presidents' office however it was informed that she's out of the island on a private vacation. Finally they called Prime minister's secretariat, but Prime minister was out on his morning walk.
Thinking at least it's best to keep him vigilant on this, the Honolulu officials left the message with the person who picked up the phone to inform Primeminister that there's a Tsunami coming from Indonesia. On prime minister's return, the operator told prime minister about the call, said TSunami from Indonesia is arriving in 2 hrs.
Prime minister promptly took action to send a delegation to Katunayake with name boards' Welcome Mr. T. Sunami - Indonesia..
All babies start out with the same number of raw cells which, over nine months, develop into a complete
female baby. The problem occurs when cells are instructed by the little chromosomes to make a male
baby instead.
Because there are only so many cells to go around, the cells necessary to develop a male's reproductive
organs have to come from cells already assigned elsewhere in the female. Recent tests have shown that
these cells are removed from the communications center of the brain, migrate lower in the body and
develop into male sexual organs.
If you visualize a normal brain to be similar to a full deck of cards, this means that males are born a few
cards short, so to speak. And some of their cards are in their shorts. This difference between the male
and female brain manifests itself in various ways.
Little girls will tend to play things like house or learn to read. Little boys, however, will tend to do more...
All babies start out with the same number of raw cells which, over nine months, develop into a complete female baby. The problem occurs when cells are instructed by the little chromosomes to make a male baby instead.
Because there are only so many cells to go around, the cells necessary to develop a male's reproductive organs have to come from cells already assigned elsewhere in the female. Recent tests have shown that these cells are removed from the communications center of the brain, migrate lower in the body and develop into male sexual organs.
If you visualize a normal brain to be similar to a full deck of cards, this means that males are born a few cards short, so to speak. And some of their cards are in their shorts. This difference between the male and female brain manifests itself in various ways.
Little girls will tend to play things like house or learn to read. Little boys, however, will tend to do things like placing a bucket over their heads and running into more...
Two buddies are on their way to the U.S. Army Induction center for physicals. Neither wants to go to war, so one says, "I hear that if you don't have any teeth they won't take you." They decide it's worth a try, so they stop at a Dentist and have all their teeth pulled.
When they arrive at the Induction Center there is a line waiting to get physicals. They decide it might look fishy if both stand in line, one after the other, so one guy heads for the back of the line. Just as he steps into line, a big 'ol farm boy hits the end of the line right in front of him, so the 2nd toothless guy lines up behind him.
The first toothless guy steps up and the doc asks, "Anything wrong with you?"
The Guy says, "Well, no, except I don't have any teeth."
The Doc says, "Open up and let me have a look." The Guy opens his mouth and the doctor runs his finger around his gums and says, "Sure enough, you stand over there." The line slowly more...
The Board of Trustees of a nearby University, decides to test the Professors, to see if they really know their stuff. First they take a Math Prof. and put him in a room. Now, the room contains a table and three metal spheres about the size of softballs. They tell him to do whatever he want with the balls and the table in one hour. After an hour, he comes out and the Trustees look in and the balls are arranged in a triangle at the center of the table. Next, they give the same test to a Physics Prof. After an hour, they look in, and the balls are stacked one on top of the other in the center of the table. Finally, they give the test to an Engineering Prof. After an hour, they look in and one of the balls is broken, one is missing, and he's carrying the third out in his lunchbox.