Chambermaid Jokes / Recent Jokes

International Travellers Bloopers1. On a French passenger jet: Live West Under Your Seat.2. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.3. In a Belgrade hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.4. In an Athens hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 a.m. daily.5. In a Yugoslav hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.6. In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.7. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel, across from a Russian monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.8. In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension (???).9. In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today: no ice cream.10. On the menu of a Swiss more...

TRAVELLER'S TALES
 
 
IN THE LOBBY OF A MOSCOW HOTEL ACROSS FROM A RUSSIAN ORTHODOX MONASTERY:
"You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet
  composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday."
IN A HOTEL IN ATHENS:
 "Visitors are expected to complain at the officebetween the hours of 9 and 11 a. m. daily."
IN A JAPANESE HOTEL:
"You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid."
IN A BANGKOK DRY CLEANER'S:
Drop your trousers here for best results.
IN A NORWEGIAN COCKTAIL LOUNGE:
Ladies are requested not to have childrenin the bar.
AT A BUDAPEST ZOO:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have anysuitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
IN THE OFFICE OF A ROMAN DOCTOR:
Specialist in women and other diseases.
IN A CZECHOSLOVAKIAN TOURIST AGENCY:
Take one of our horse-driven citytours. We guarantee no more...

Sign on a Norfolk farm: "Trespassers beware! I shoot every tenth trespasser. The ninth one just left."Sign seen in London department store: "Bargain Basement Upstairs" Sign seen in the vicinity of Victoria Station: "Closed for official opening." Sign in a Paris hotel elevator: "Please leave your values at the front desk." Sign in a hotel in Athens: "Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily."Sign in a Yugoslavian hotel: "The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid."Sign in a Japanese hotel: "You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid." Sign in a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: "You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Sign on a Norfolk farm: "Trespassers beware! I shoot every tenth trespasser. The ninth one just left." Sign seen in London department store: "Bargain Basement Upstairs" Sign seen in the vicinity of Victoria Station: "Closed for official opening." Sign in a Paris hotel elevator: "Please leave your values at the front desk." Sign in a hotel in Athens: "Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A. M. daily." Sign in a Yugoslavian hotel: "The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid." Sign in a Japanese hotel: "You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid." Sign in a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: "You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

International Travellers Bloopers
1. On a French passenger jet: Live West Under Your Seat.
2. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
3. In a Belgrade hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
4. In an Athens hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 a.m. daily.
5. In a Yugoslav hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
6. In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
7. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel, across from a Russian monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
8. In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension (???).
9. In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today: more...