Charge Jokes / Recent Jokes
"Cash, check or charge?" the cashier asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As the woman fumbled for her wallet, the cashier noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"Do you always carry your TV remote?" the cashier asked.
"No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him."
A bald headed person entered a barber's shop and enquired:"How much is the hair cut charge?"
"ten rupees", replied the barber.
"Why do you charge so much for cutting just a few hair,"asked the person.
"No sir" replied the barber."The charge is not for cutting them but for finding them".
THE BODY PARTS MEETING
One day the different parts of the body were having an argument to see which should be in charge:
The brain said "I do all the thinking so I'm the most important and I should be in charge."
The eyes said "I see everything and let the rest of you know where we are, so I'm the most important and I should be in charge."
The hands said: "Without me we wouldn't be able to pick anything up or move anything. So I'm the most important and I should be in charge."
The stomach said: "I turn the food we eat into energy for the rest of you. Without me, we'd starve. So I'm the most important and I should be in charge."
The legs said: "Without me we wouldn't be able to move anywhere. I'm the most important and I should be in charge."
Then the rectum said: "I think I should be in charge." All the rest of the parts said: YOU?!! You don't do anything! You're not as important as we are, surely! more...
THE BODY PARTS MEETINGOne day the different parts of the body were having an argument to see which should be in charge:The brain said "I do all the thinking so I'm the most important and I should be in charge."The eyes said "I see everything and let the rest of you know where we are, so I'm the most important and I should be in charge."The hands said: "Without me we wouldn't be able to pick anything up or move anything. So I'm the most important and I should be in charge."The stomach said: "I turn the food we eat into energy for the rest of you. Without me, we'd starve. So I'm the most important and I should be in charge."The legs said: "Without me we wouldn't be able to move anywhere. I'm the most important and I should be in charge."Then the rectum said: "I think I should be in charge." All the rest of the parts said: YOU?!! You don't do anything! You're not as important as we are, surely! You can't be in charge!"So more...
The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge. Each organ took a turn speaking up:
Brain.... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood... I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it wants to go.
Eyes... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole... I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.
All the other parts laughed and made the asshole very mad. To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief.
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly.
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable.
Day 4 - Eyes became more...
The boss came early in the morning one day and found his manager kissing his secretary.
He shouted at him, "Is this what I pay you for?"
The manager replied: "No, sir, this I do free of charge."