Chinese Jokes / Recent Jokes

Heaven:
An American salary.
A British home.
Chinese food.
A Japanese wife.
Hell:
A Chinese salary.
A Japanese home.
British food.
An American wife.
or...
Heaven is where the Lovers are Italian, the Engineers are German, the Police are British, and it is all managed by the Swiss.
Hell is where the Lovers are Swiss, the Engineers are British, the Police are German, and it is all managed by the Italians!

The Moon and the Sun Two wise men were talking about the Moon and the Sun. They wanted to figure out which one was more valuable. Finally, they came to a conclusion: "We know that the moon has twice the value of the Sun because the Moon shines at night when everyone needs light, but the sun shines only during the day when no one needs it.

Q: What do you call a chinese woman the size of a fence?
A: Pai Ling
(pailing)

there were three guys in an airplane:a japanese, a chinese, and an american guy.The japanese guy jumps off and flicks up a penny.He goes into the little kids house and says little hid why r u crying, the little kid told him something coppery came down and hit my dad on the head and knocked him out.Then the chinese guy jumps off and flicks up a nickle, he goes in the little kids house and says little kid y r u crying, the little kid says something silvery fell on my moms head and knocked her out.Then the american guy jumps off and flicks up a grenade, he goes in the little kids house and says little kid y r u laughing the little kid says my granma farted and blew up the next door neighbors house.

A blind man with a lighted candle A blind man was accustomed to holding a burning candle in hand when going out in the evening. One night a man passed by the blind man in a great hurry. But he was so curious at the sight that he asked, "Does the candle have special use to you, blind man? I thinking it`s a sheer waste." The blind man answered, "If I hadn`t had this little light in my hand, wouldn`t I have been knocked down by a dare devil like you?"

The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like
Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to the fact
that WonTon spelled backwards is Not Now.

What do you call a retarded Chinese baby? Sum Ting Wong