Chivalry Jokes

Chivalry has changed from the days of Sir Walter Raleigh, but contrary to rumor, it hasn't died out altogether: A man will still lay his coat at the feet of a pretty girl; the difference is that nowadays it's intended to keep her back from getting dirty.

The divorce proceedings had been long, contentious, and extremely heated.
Finally, the husband's attorney rose for one last try at a no-alimony settlement. "Your Honor," he said, "my client sincerely believes his wife is being absolutely ridiculous. Why, most women would love to have a husband who still believes in chivalry; and on the day in question, he was only opening the door for her out of chivalry."
"Counselor," replied the judge, "I am granting the divorce and the settlement Mrs. Ralston is asking in its entirety. I simply cannot believe chivalry was the motivation for your client opening that car door - while he was driving down the freeway at 65 mph."

The divorce proceedings had been long, contentious, and extremely heated. Finally, the husband's attorney rose for one last try at a no-alimony settlement.

"Your Honor," he said, "my client sincerely believes his wife is just being ridiculous. Why, most women would love to have a husband who still believes in chivalry; and on the day in question, he was only opening the door for her out of chivalry."

"Counselor," replied the judge, "I am granting the divorce and the settlement Mrs. Smith is asking in its entirely. I simply cannot believe chivalry was the motivation for your client opening that car door - while he was driving down the freeway at 65 mph."

"Your Honor, my wife is just being ridiculous. Most women would love to have a husband who still believes in chivalry and I was only opening the door for her out of chivalry."

"Mr. Smith," replied the judge, "I am granting the divorce. I cannot believe chivalry was your motivation while driving 65 mph."