Classroom Jokes / Recent Jokes

The teacher walked into the classroom to find words like "cunt" and "cock" scrawled all over the blackboard. "Children," she said, addressing the classroom, "you are much too young to use vile language like that. Now we're all going to close our eyes and count up to fifty. Then, while our eyes are closed, I want the little boy or girl who wrote those words on the board to tiptoe up and erase them." At the signal, the teacher and the children all closed their eyes. Then the teacher counted out loud, very slowly. When she reached fifty, she said, "All right. Everybody open their eyes." All eyes went to the blackboard. None of the words were erased. But below them was the message: "Fuck you, teacher! The Phantom strikes again!"

A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her 6th grade class. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class.

She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Bobby?"
"Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters."
"Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't want to see you for three days!"

The teacher turns back to the chalkboard.
Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks, "What's so funny Billy?"

"Well teacher, I just saw BOTH of your garters."
Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe, and tells him - "I don't want to see you for three more...

Little Siripala, also known as "Amdon" is a child who was well aware of all the adult stuff and obscene language.
Once Siripala's teacher (a lady teacher) who was so annoyed with his use of obscene language, told Siripala to ask his mother to meet her the following day. Siripala's mother, who was pregnant, came to meet the teacher, the following day. As she entered the classroom, Siripala, pointing his finger to his mother's tummy, shouted saying "teacher! teacher! I did this! I did this!".
The teacher was very angry, and she told the mother "Look for yourself how your son behaves in the classroom. He is spoiling the other students also. That is why I wanted you to see me". The mother was helplessly looking at the teacher.
Then the teacher, turning towards Siripala said very angrily "How dare you tell something like that to your own mother". Then Siripala said "I am telling you the truth; I did this". Then the teacher so more...

A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her Grade 6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class.
She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Pat?"
"Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters."
"Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't want to see you for three days."
The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks, "What's so funny Billy?"
"Well miss, I just saw both of your garters."
Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe, "I don't want to see you for three weeks."
Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser more...

A teacher called upon the classroom to make sentences with words previously chosen.
The teacher smiled when Pete, a slow learner, raised his hand to participate during the challenge of making a sentence with the words "Defeat," "Defense," "Deduct," and "Detail."
Pete stood thinking for a while, all eyes focused on him while his classmates awaited his reply. Smiling, he the proudly said, "Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail."

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a
plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit
under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the
first day of the term, still with the cast under his
shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest
students in school.
Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he
opened the window as wide as possible and then busied
himself with desk work. The classroom became a bit
unruly and he admonished them.
This happened several times. When he could do work at
his desk, the strong breeze from the window made his
tie flap annoyingly. He kept rearranging and
rearranging the tie as the class raised its level of
unruliness.
Finally, becoming disgusted with the wayward tie, he
stood up and took a big stapler off his desk and
stapled the tie to his chest in several places.
Discipline was not a problem from that day forth.

In a Classroom the teacher asks; Maria, go to the map and find North America
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.