Claude Jokes
Funny Jokes
It was entertainment night at the senior center, and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his stuff. As Claude went to the front of the meeting room, he announced, "Unlike most hypnotists who invite two or three people up here to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."
The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. "I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six generations."
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch..."
The crowd was mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch until suddenly, it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and more...Maude and Claude, both 91, lived in a retirement community. They met in their social center and discovered over time that they enjoyed each other's company.
After several weeks of meeting for coffee, Claude asked Maude out for dinner and much to his delight, she accepted. They had a lovely evening.
They dined at the most romantic restaurant in town, and despite his age, Claude was still a charmer. Afterward Claude asked Maude to join him at his place for an after dinner drink.
Things continued along a natural course and age being no inhibitor Maude soon joined Claude for a most enjoyable roll in the hay. As they were basking in the after glow of the
magic moment they'd shared, each was lost for a time in their own thoughts.
Claude was thinking: "If I'd known she was a virgin, I'd have been more gentle."
Maude was thinking: "If I'd known he could still do it, I'd have taken off my pantyhose- Add a Useful Link
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