Commuter Jokes / Recent Jokes

Gentlemen: I have been riding trains daily for the last two years,
and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every day. I
am tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a 14-mile trip. I
think the transportation system is worse than that enjoyed by people
2,000 years ago.
Yours truly, A Commuter Dear Sir: We received your letter with
reference to the shortcomings of our service and believe you are
somewhat confused in your history. The only mode of transportation
2,000 years ago was by foot. Sincerely, The Railroad Gentlemen:
I am in receipt of your letter, and I think you are the ones who are
confused in your history. If you will refer to the Bible, Book of
David, 9th Chapter, you will find that Balaam rode to town on his
ass. That, gentlemen, is something I have not been able to do on
your train in the last two years.
Your truly, A Commuter

A small twin-prop commuter plane was hijacked by a desperate animal rights extremist who vowed to kill one of the passengers to demonstrate his serious intentions. There were two passengers present, a microbiologist and a yeast geneticist. The hijacker gave each one two minutes to explain why they shouldnt be killed. The microbiologist (who studied bacteria) talked for 1 minute 59 seconds explaining that he studies bacteria, bacteria are model organisms for the study of genetics and physiology etc. etc. and finished with an emotional, bacteria-laden plea which had the hijacker in tears. When he was done, they turned to the yeast geneticist who said, "let me explain to you why yeast genetics is an important discipline..." but he was interrupted by the microbiologist who exclaimed "Shoot me! Shoot me!"

Gentlemen: I have been riding trains daily for the last two years, and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every day. Iam tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a 14-mile trip. Ithink the transportation system is worse than that enjoyed by people2,000 years ago.Yours truly, A Commuter Dear Sir: We received your letter withreference to the shortcomings of our service and believe you aresomewhat confused in your history. The only mode of transportation2,000 years ago was by foot. Sincerely, The Railroad Gentlemen:I am in receipt of your letter, and I think you are the ones who areconfused in your history. If you will refer to the Bible, Book ofDavid, 9th Chapter, you will find that Balaam rode to town on hisass. That, gentlemen, is something I have not been able to do onyour train in the last two years.Your truly, A Commuter

Gentlemen: I have been riding trains daily for the last two years, and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every day. Iam tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a 14-mile trip. Ithink the transportation system is worse than that enjoyed by people2, 000 years ago. Yours truly, A Commuter Dear Sir: We received your letter withreference to the shortcomings of our service and believe you aresomewhat confused in your history. The only mode of transportation2, 000 years ago was by foot. Sincerely, The Railroad Gentlemen: I am in receipt of your letter, and I think you are the ones who areconfused in your history. If you will refer to the Bible, Book ofDavid, 9th Chapter, you will find that Balaam rode to town on hisass. That, gentlemen, is something I have not been able to do onyour train in the last two years. Your truly, A Commuter

The following is an exchange of correspondence between a customer and Irish.
Rail:
Gentlemen, I have been riding trains daily for the last two years, and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every day. I am tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a 14-mile trip. I think the transportation system is worse than that enjoyed by people 2, 000 years ago. Yours truly,
A Commuter.

------------------------------------------------ Dear Sir, We received your letter with reference to the shortcomings of our service and believe you are somewhat confused in your history. The only mode of transportation 2, 000 years ago was by foot. Sincerely,
Iarnrod Eireann.

---------------------------------------------- Gentlemen,
I am in receipt of your letter, and I think you are the ones who are confused in your history. If you will refer to the Bible, Book of David, 9th Chapter, you will find that Balaam rode to town on his ass. That, more...