Constitution Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Founding Fathers were sitting around a table sometime in 1776, working on the constitution. It had been a long day.Father1: Whew! It's getting rather warm in here, isn't it?Father2: Shall I open the window?Father1: No, that's alright. I'll just take off my jacket, and roll up my sleeves.Father2: Hey, that's a good idea. Why don't we include that in the constitution?Father1: What? That we're allowed to take our jackets off and roll up our sleeves while at work?Father2: Yeah, but that doesn't sound very smooth. How about "Everyone shall have the right to bare arms?"

Terminology:
Shotgun - The rightmost front passenger seat in a vehicle, a prime choice for any passenger, since it is the most comfortable seat, and also because of the psychological advantage of not being forced to subserviently look at the back of another person's head during a trip.
Enthronement - The physical presence of a person in the Shotgun position.
By Laws:
Vehicle Ownership
The owner of a vehicle, if he/she isn't driving, always gets Shotgun in that vehicle. It is their car, it is their seat and they get it. This is a real bonus for an owner who is falling down drunk. They can rest assured Shotgun is rightfully theirs. They won't have to worry about concentrating through an alcohol-induced haze simply to remember to call Shotgun in their own hard-earned car. Once proper Shotgun "enthronement" rights have been established, they may also be surrendered. If the owner of the vehicle is eligible for Shotgun, but wants to sleep it off in the back more...

Chandrika: I considered you as a freedom fighter, the moment I read,
“HARD HARD ONE IS THE BIG BIG GOOD ONE(to be
circulated)” Written by you to the infolanka joke page.

Chandrika: Please show me how to bring a political change in Sri Lanka.
ULTRA MICROS: Your Excellency, its this New Constitution.
Chandrika: Will People Support Me.
ULTRA MICROS: Its Foolishness if they don’t do so.
ULTRA MICROS: Your Excellency, good luck to you.

ULTRA MICRO CONSTITUTION OF THE DEMOCRATIC SOCIALIST REPUBLIC OF SRI LANKA.
Section 1
Democratic Socialist Republic of Sri Lanka is an unitary
State Which Is Comprised of 24 Key Administrative District
Councils and There Sub Councils.
Section 2
All Laws relating to Citizenship, Matrimony, Inheritance and
Succession shall be governed by The General Law.
Section 3
English, Sinhala and Tamil shall be Official Languages.
Section 4
There shall be The more...

You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat, than U.S. nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists.
You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.
You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.
You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who've never been outside of more...

ULTRA MICRO CONSTITUTION OF THE DEMOCRATIC SOCIALIST REPUBLIC OF SRI LANKA

Section 1
Democratic Socialist Republic of Sri Lanka is an unitary
State Which Is Comprised of 24 Key Administrative District
Councils and their Sub Councils.
Section 2
All Laws relating to Citizenship, Matrimony, Inheritance and
Succession shall be governed by The General Law.
Section 3
English, Sinhala and Tamil shall be Official Languages.
Section 4
There shall be The Freedom of Speech, Expression and
Publication and The Freedom of Worship.
Section 5
All Levels of Health, Education and Industry are open to
Private Sector Investors.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Regards,
ULTRA MICROS