Cross-eyed Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to him, "My dogs cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for it?"
"Well," said the vet "let's have a look at him" The vet picks the dog up by the ears and has a good look at its eyes.
"Well," says the vet "I'm going to have to put him down."
"Just because he's cross-eyed?" say's the man.
"No, because he's heavy," says the vet.

A man took his rottweiler to the vet. "Excuse me, but my dog has gone cross-eyed," the man said. "Could you please help?"
So, the vet picked up the dog and looked at his eyes and teeth. "I'm sorry, sir, but I'm going to have to put your dog down," the vet said.
"Why, because he's cross-eyed?" the alarmed man asked.
"No, because he's too heavy!" replied the vet.

An aging cattle-rancher bought a bull at a livestock auction. When he got it to the ranch house, he noticed that it was cross-eyed. Very upset that he'd received damaged goods, he called a veterinary optometrist to come out and look at his new bull's cross-eyes.
The optometrist checked out the bull's eyes, then proceeded to go to his truck for a 10 foot section of plastic hose and an air compressor. He cranked up the air compressor and hooked the hose to it, then inserted about 2 feet of the other end of the hose into the bull's colon. He then shot a highly charged spray of air into the hose, causing the bull to literally jump off the ground. He then walked around to the front of the bull and said, "Well, that takes care of his cross-eyes. They're normal now." He then handed the rancher a vet bill for $1,000.
The rancher was extremely disturbed by the $1,000 vet bill. He said, "My God, you spent all of 10 minutes with the bull and all you did was blow some air more...