Dad Jokes / Recent Jokes

Bantu returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father." dad, today we had a spelling class - all the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but i knew the whole thing. Is that because i am sardar?

"no son, that's because you are intelligent. " bantu seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "dad, today we had math class - all the other kids could only count from 1-10, i could count from 1 to 20. Is this Because i am sardar? ?"

"no son, that's because you are intelligent," replies his father. Happy with the answer, bantu poses another question to his father, "dad, today we had medical examination, all the other boys were shorter than me, i was at least twice their height. Is that because i am sardar? ?"

The father replies, "no son, that's because you are 31 years old."

> Dear Dad,
>
> Hi, How are you and Mom? $chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of
> friend$
> and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of
> anything
> I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love
> to hear from you.
> Love,
> Your $on
The Reply:
>
> Dear Son,
>
> I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even
> an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a
> NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
> Lovingly
> Mom & Dad

"Dad, why do you write so slow?" asked Dennis. "I have to," replied his father. "Im a slow reader."

Morris calls his son in NY and says, "Benny, I have something to tell you. However, I don't want to discuss it. I'm merely telling you because you're my oldest child, and I thought you ought to know. I've made up my mind, I'm divorcing Mama."

The son is shocked, and asks his father to tell him what happened. "I don't want to get into it. My mind is made up."

"But Dad, you just can't decide to divorce Mama just like that after 54 years together. What happened?"

"It's too painful to talk about it. I only called because you're my son, and I thought you should know. I really don't want to get into it anymore than this. You can call your sister and tell her. It will spare me the pain."

"But where's Mama? Can I talk to her?"

"No, I don't want you to say anything to her about it. I haven't told her yet. Believe me it hasn't been easy. I've agonized over it for several days, and I've more...

Dear Mom and Dad: Since I left for college I have been remiss in writing and I am sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. You are not to read any further unless you are sitting down. Okay? Well then, I am getting along pretty well now. The skull fracture and the concussion I got when I jumped out of the window of my dormitory when it caught fire shortly after my arrival here is pretty well healed now. I only spent two weeks in the hospital and now I can see almost normally and only get those sick headaches once a day. Fortunately, the fire in the dormitory and my jump were witnessed by an attendant at the gas station near the dorm, and he was the one who called the Fire Department and the ambulance. He also visited me in the hospital, and since I have nowhere to live because of the burned-out dormitory, he was kind enough to invite me to share his apartment with him. It's really a basement more...

Sardars son was filling application form. in form it was asked about mother tounge. son asked dad wat shld i write here?
dad says write VERY LONG.

On the boy's 14th birthday, he went to his dad and said, "Dad, I am 14 years old today. Can I drive your Ferrari?"
Dad said, "Son, can your dick reach up to your arse?" The son replied, "No, Dad."
Dad replied, "Then you can't drive my Ferrari"
When the boy was 16 he went to his dad and said, "Dad, I am 16 years old today. Can I drive your Ferrari?"
Dad said, "Son, can your dick reach up to your arse?" The son replied, "No, not yet, Dad."
Dad said "Then you can't drive my Ferrari"
On the boy's 21st birthday, he went to his dad and said, "Dad, I am 21 years old today. Can I drive your Ferrari?"
Dad said, "Son, can your dick reach up to your arse?" The son replied, "Yes Dad, my dick is now long enough to reach my arse".
Dad said "Then go and screw yourself, but you can't drive my Ferrari"